Find My Way The Letter
by anais117
Summary: A series of one shots in the Find My Way Universe. Katniss is a young Muslim woman who lives in Brooklyn, New York and is at a point in her life where it's time to choose a suitable husband. Her family has their ideas but what happens when she becomes involved in a friendship with the owner of the local bakery? Modern Day AU Disclaimer: I Do Not Own The Hunger Games.


**Here is the full version of the story I wrote for fandom4lls. Enjoy!**

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Katniss sits in the corner of Peeta's couch with her legs folded with a letter in her hand, and her head bowed. The anniversary of her mother's death is upon her and the realization that it took her this long to have the courage to read her mother's final words to her.

"It's been 7 years, two days ago, that I lost my mom," Katniss murmurs at her hands.

"Is that why you've been so quiet these past few days?" Peeta asks and Katniss responds with a nod of her head.

"Does your family do anything to celebrate her life each year?"

"We used to for a little while, but ever since my brother Rory's wife Prim moved in and their son Vick was born, everyone seems to be preoccupied." Katniss shifts uncomfortably in her seat and Peeta studies her not knowing exactly what to expect. He's knows he'll want to comfort her but he doesn't know how. Being with Katniss has been different. They don't have a clearly defined relationship but spend more time together since that day in the back of his bakery when he told her he was interested in getting to know her better.

"I never imagined it would be like this," Katniss begins. "That my family would slowly forget about Mom and move on with their lives."

"Maybe they're not as strong as you when it comes to grief and instead buried it deep inside."

"I'm not strong," Katniss shakes her head.

"You are. You're strongest person I know, honestly." Katniss looks up at smiles briefly before putting her head back down and staring at her hands. A few moments later she speaks.

"Is that what you did after your mom died?" Katniss questions picking her head up again.

"Yes," he responds softly. "I couldn't face it at first. Everything reminded me of her, the bakery, this apartment, my dad. It was all too much so I tried to push it away."

"Did it work?"

"No." Katniss stares at Peeta, his eyes so blue and his hair messy and curly on his forehead. She's nearly tempted to close the space between them and push that one curl away for him but they haven't shared any affection beyond a hug.

"Every year I'm reminded of how much I miss her and how much I wish she were here to help me during this time of my life. All the changes with Rory getting married and having a child, Gale moving away with Johanna to their new house, and Dad becoming interested in dating again. Now with me having to choose a husband; it's just all too much."

"Maybe the letter will help. Is that why you're opening it this year?"

"I think so," Katniss replies looking down at her hands again. Her legs are folded tightly against her almost cradling herself wishing there was someone else who could do that for her.

Peeta moves closer to her on the couch stopping a few inches from her knees and continues to study her form hoping to be able to read in her posture what will come next. In one swift movement and a deep breath Katniss opens the envelope and pulls out the letter. She carefully unfolds it and begins to read.

Peeta is silent watching her and steadily her expression changes as she reads on. Her gray eyes become shiny and tears well up. He is cautious as he continues to watch her, waiting for the moment to bring her to him to comfort her in the aftermath of the emotions that are beginning to spill out.

"Assalaamu Álaykum Katniss," she begins reading and Peeta eyes widen with the implication of her words. She's sharing this very personal letter with him and he can't believe it. Katniss trusts him and this makes his heart swell in response but he can't smile now, all he can do is listen to her.

"You have always been the strongest in the family, the most determined, and the most free spirited. I know it was hard coming back to Pakistan with me but at the time I wanted to protect you from all that could have caused you to lose your way back home with your brothers and Dad. I should have trusted you then, but at the same time I don't regret bringing you back here. The lessons you learned about our culture, our religion, and how important school is, are priceless. You have grown into a wonderful woman who I know will become that doctor you set out to become." Tears are running down Katniss' face now, and Peeta lifts his hand hesitantly and sets it down on her forearm.

"Take care of Rory and his future family. Listen to Gale and your father and trust in Allah. I hope that when you finally read this letter, there's someone that cares about you there with you. I love you Katniss. Fi Amanullah, Mom." Katniss sets down the letter on the side table next to the couch and completely breaks down. Without a beat Peeta moves to her and wraps an arm around her shoulders bringing her closer to him. Her hiccupping sobs permeate throughout the room as Peeta runs his free hand down her arm and Katniss begins to lean against his chest. Her face is red and the tears stain her cheeks but she's beautiful to him being so open and allowing him to see this.

The last time he felt raw emotion like this was when they prayed together during Ramadan and she donned his mother's hijab. Other guys would have remarked how beautiful the woman in their life looked once they finally saw her without the scarf, but with Katniss it was different. When she emerged from the other room ready to join him in the living room to pray, he was taken aback by her beauty. The color of the scarf brought out the gray of her eyes while shaping her olive face in a perfect oval accented with arched eyebrows and pouty lips. He had never really looked at her before this closely and it took him a few minutes to refocus himself on the task at hand.

Peeta begins to whisper words to her and for a moment she quiets listening to something she hasn't heard this closely in a long while. They're comfort words used by Pakistani mothers to calm their children and while Prim says them to Vick all the time, it affects her more now as she remembers her own mother speaking them to her.

He moves his hand again and places it on the back of her head and he continues to speak softly and stroke her braid. Tears are still running down her face as she takes comfort in his speech and hangs on to each word as it floats around her ears.

Steadily she calms against him and he never ceases the words that are bringing her so much peace.

"How did you know?" Katniss finally manages after she turns her head to look up at him. He stops in mid-sentence at the sight of her eyes on him and smiles shyly.

"I didn't. I just thought about how I would like to be comforted if I was thinking about my mother."

"I have many good memories of her saying those words to me," she tells him, her chin still resting on his chest as she stares at him.

"I remember too from when I was little, but it seems you're never too old for them." Peeta smiles and runs a hand across Katniss' cheek. "Would you like some tea?" Peeta offers and Katniss nods her head slowly unable to break the gaze she has on him. He doesn't seem to want to either.

Peeta proceeds to the kitchen reluctantly to put on the tea kettle. He sets up two cups with spice tea bags on the table.

"How do you take yours?" He requests to Katniss.

"Just a little milk please," Katniss answers from the couch. She sits quietly smiling to herself at how safe and warm she felt in Peeta's arms.

Soon after the tea kettle whistles and Peeta completes the tea and adds a few almond cookies on a plate, bringing them all over on a tray to Katniss.

"Thank you," Katniss says in Peeta's direction as he hands her the mug and she brings it to her mouth. "Mmm, this tea is really good," she says after taking a sip. "Why don't you serve it at the bakery?"

"I don't know. My mom always ordered the one we have now so I just left it that way," Peeta smiles faintly before going back to his tea.

"What was she like, if you don't mind me asking?" Katniss sets down her mug and shifts toward him waiting for his response.

"Well," Peeta breathes, "My mother was interesting to say the least. When we were little she was very involved and doting but things changed as we got older. When she didn't go back to Pakistan after she graduated from college and she married my father; an American man, her family steadily distanced themselves from her. Over the years it became difficult for her and unfortunately she took it out on her sons and her husband."

"I'm so sorry," Katniss offers scooting closer to him and placing her hand on his.

"Thank you. It was just really interesting when she got sick because we all chose to stuff the past down and just be there for her. I loved my mother and all I wanted to do was remember how she was before." Katniss continues to stare at Peeta but now he's looking away trying not to let the emotion that is welling up inside of him come out.

"It's okay," Katniss soothes running a hand along his forearm. What a wonderful turn of events that they both would comfort the other today. Peeta smiles weakly before a tear falls down his cheek. Katniss immediately goes to hug him and he leans down on her shoulder finally letting himself cry softly against her.

She rubs his back as he shakes against her and uses some of those same comforting words he just used to help her. Katniss draws up her knees so that she is fully against him and he pulls her closer to him. They are wrapped up into the other and they both feel a sense of calm and safety they hadn't felt in a while.

When Peeta stops crying, he pulls away to see that Katniss has a few tears down her face as well. He places a hand on her cheek wiping them away and she smiles repeating the gesture on his cheek. They sit there staring and studying the other until eventually the space grows smaller between them. Peeta is the first to lower his head a bit and Katniss lifts hers to meet him halfway. Their lips touch chastely as first but then Katniss closes the space again. Peeta receives her eagerly and for the first time they experience this form of affection with the other.

Katniss shifts almost kneeling in front of him and he takes her by the waist and pulls her into his lap. He continues to explore her mouth tasting it for the first time, the taste of tea still tart there. Katniss has never had a kiss so deep and passionate before and the feeling of it sends shivers down her spine and throughout her body. It just feels so right for the two of them to be this way.

A little while later they settle down kissing the other languidly until Katniss begins to giggle.

"What?" Peeta asks softly.

"Nothing," Katniss smiles at him shyly running her finger across his chest. She's still secure in his lap, his arms protectively around her. "I just never thought we'd get to this point you know?" Katniss admits to him.

"I'm glad we did," Peeta replies leaning down to capture her lips briefly. "It hasn't been easy all those times we'd be together and then end the night with a hug."

"You don't like my hugs?" Katniss feigns offense.

"I love your hugs, but I wanted to hold you closer and longer, like this." Peeta squeezes her against him and her head falls against his chest. Katniss listens to his heartbeat as he traces invisible circles on her lower back. She's so incredibly relaxed that she doesn't hear her phone go off.

"Is that mine or yours?"

"Mine," Katniss answers and reluctantly untangles herself from his lap to fish through her purse on the floor. "It's a text from my dad. I need to head home." Peeta nods his head and inches off the couch as Katniss picks up her purse from the floor. He takes her hand and walks with her to the door.

"I wish you didn't have to go," Peeta whispers to her as he places a loose strand behind her ear.

"Me too, but we'll be together in a few days. There's that art gallery opening in Manhattan you wanted to take me to."

"That's true," Peeta smiles at her. "Thank you for everything today."

"No, _thank _you. I didn't think I would be able to get through that letter or this year's anniversary."

"I'm glad I was able to be here for you." Peeta closes the space between them and presses a small kiss on her lips. "You know your mother was right."

"About what?"

"You did have someone with you that cared about you when you read the letter." Katniss smiles shyly at him and he goes for another kiss.

"Text me later okay?" She requests afterward.

"Of course. I'll tuck you in tonight." Katniss lets out a small laugh and leans up on her tip toes to wrap her arms around his neck. Peeta places his hands on her hips and they embrace. As Katniss unwraps herself from him she meets his lips again, quickly getting lost in the sensation of him.

"I need to get going," Katniss breathes against his mouth. Peeta nibbles her bottom lip one last time before she walks out of his embrace and to the door.

"See you later Katniss."

"Later."

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**Thank you so much for reading my story! It will be a part of a larger series in this world. Please don't hesitate to leave feedback and to find me on Tumblr under lenai17 or anais117-fanfic. Also if there is anything that is inaccurate within this story in regards to Islam, please don't hesitate to message me! I did a lot of research but I could have still gotten some things wrong. Thanks again!**


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